A lesson in labels

In my cultural diversity class today the prof asked us to make a web of four stereotypical labels that we associate ourselves with. We were then asked three questions related to them. One question in particular I found really interesting.

The question was: Share a story about a time it was especially painful to be identified with one of your identifiers or descriptors.

The descriptors that I wrote down on my paper were: Christian, Athlete, Teenage caucasian female and daughter. Looking at question three on the paper, I found it hard to pinpoint a time or experience in which I had felt judged by a certain stereotype. I'm not a minority, I have no disabilities...basically I am an average, white, middle class, Canadian. But then I thought a little harder and was able to come up with a story.

When I was growing up, I was friends with a group of girls all my age, all living within the same neighborhood. We travelled all the way through the public school system together. Elementary school, middle school and finally high school. We were always a tightly knit group. Of course there were benefits to having such a tight group of girlfriends. I was pretty much granted automatic popularity and I never had any troubles finding a friend to hang out with. But I also never gained any individualism. I was seen as a part of a whole rather than the individual that I was. And because I was fairly quiet, it was taken for granted that I was just another version of all my friends. And seeing as all my friends were blonde haired and very ditzy, I gained that reputation as well. Even though I always maintained a high GPA all through school, I was seen as a dumb blonde. And how did I deal with it? I acted the part. Instead of purposely trying to change the stereotype that was placed upon myself, I accepted it as truth and began to act in ways that verified the generalization. I did things like asking stupid questions that I already knew the answer to and dumbing-down my vocabulary. I truly believed that I was stupid.

To this day I have troubles believing that I am smart. I have long since stopped 'dumbing' myself down. Yet I still write off my good grades as school smarts - anyone can read a book or listen to a lecture and answer questions on it. I refuse to accredit myself with anything other than good work habits.

Just thinking about this one scenario in my life makes me understand how and why people are the way they are. Our past and the labels that people have placed upon us do have a big impact on who we become. I could have chosen to ignore the stereotype that I was burdened with. I chose to conform to it instead and I am not proud of that. But other people have more difficult labels placed upon their shoulders. Labels and circumstances like disabilities and poverty that actually limit them physically and circumstancially.

How you deal with these generalizations shapes and molds you into the person you are. Everyone deals with stereotypes in their lifetime. Some people rise above them to accomplish amazing things, others stumble over them their whole lives.

It's all in how you deal...